Eat Dirt, Sucker

Puter Kapala:
Throw someone down to the ground
With a push and twist.


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Someday

Mom retired today.
I hope to have a career
From which to retire.


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The Cat, Not the Beer

Guinness is the best.
Plays with strings all by herself.
Doesn't need my help.


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Alternative medicine

I'm fairly certain
The cure for all that ails me
Is in Hawaii.


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Feed a Fever, Feed a Cold

Welcome to Illville.
Take off your shoes and relax
And have a lozenge.



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I Be Illin'

Got sick for Spring Break.
Stupid germs pouncing on me,
Ruining my fun.


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It Happens

Yesterday's haiku?
It got lost in the shuffle.
It's here now, just late.


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Happy Day to Me

My birthday haiku
On my awesome new iPad
What a superb day!


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The last day I can quote Aunt Jackie

36 years old
Flabby arm, pelican neck
All my plants are dead


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Sometimes song lyrics get stuck in my head, 12 syllables at a time

I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
(Bon Jovi haiku)


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Breathing room

I still have homework
But nothing's due for a week.
Viva la spring break!


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I'm almost out of words

Writing a paper,
A very big, big paper,
All the livelong day.


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Runners are High

Runners are liars.
There's no high, except knowing
That the run will end.


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Shamrocks are better than real rocks

Corned beef and cabbage
Plus booze and friends and more booze
This holiday rocks


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Blimey

Hello, Bud Light Lime
You're tasty on a Friday.
Or, well, any day.


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Maybe I should eat more

I found the drawback
Of a life without belt loops.
Pants keep falling down.


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I like pi

Won a scholarship,
Small but still very awesome.
Happy Pi Day, me!


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Ode to a Database Design Lecture

Dying of boredom
It's totally possible
I choose cremation


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Not my best day in JKD

Flailing arms and legs
And knives and sticks and body.
Coordination.


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Citizenship is Job 1

Helped a girl today
Returned her missing items
Glad she wasn't killed.



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Double double toil and trouble

Two things I don't like:
Big headaches and group projects.
Both make me stabby.


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OmNomNom

Food makes me happy.
Especially Outback steak.
Eating my feelings.


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Crappy day at the library

Hey, dirty diaper.
What'cha doin' over here
In the teen section?

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I like degs

Service dogs only?
I'd rather shop where the rule's
Service kids only.


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Yum-o-Rama of the Sea

Dear sweet Red Lobster,
I love eating your crab legs.
And your popcorn shrimp.


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Death by Grad School

Help. Ten-page paper.
RDA metadata.
My brain is mushy.


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Cat butt stamp of approval

Trying to do stuff
With kitty sprawled all over.
More door than window.




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This much fun should be illegal

Fun Saturday night
Doing homework and homework.
Party animal.


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Sansabelts

Belt loops are for chumps.
I've found the comfort secret:
Elastic waistband.


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National Craft Month

In like a lion,
Out like a lamb. Corned beef and
Birthday in between.


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