Day 172: Chicken Fettucini Alfredo

Today I cooked. I was on a high after finishing two big assignments, and my chicken wasn't going to last another day.


It was okay, but not worth all the effort. Maybe next time I have chicken breasts about to turn, I'll just grill them and have them on a big salad.

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Day 171: Roller Derby Geeky Zazzle Necklace

More goodness put up on my Zazzle store today.

I'm sure all your kickass derby-loving friends would enjoy one of these. Buy a dozen, just in case.

Day 170: Required Drinking

Today has been filled with schoolwork and the frustration of dealing with a professor incapable of being clear about assignments and due dates. I guess I'll get one of those each semester.

So I reached a point this evening when I could either explode into a billion shards of angry razor blades or have a drink.

So here's the drink I invented: Fireball cinnamon whiskey + homemade peanut vodka + applejack brandy + apple juice.


I guess it tasted like an apple smeared with peanut butter and sprinkled with red hots. But it wasn't really about the taste.

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Day 169: Princess Tea Party

Tonight I helped out at the library's Father-Daughter Tea. It was very sweet to see the little girls dressed as princesses, and to see the dads laboriously writing up creative stories of how they met their little princesses.

I was in charge of crepe paper streamer decorations and photography, so I made myself a little flower with extra crepe paper. The little girls made froot loop bracelets and princess crowns, and when they were done with theirs, a few of the girls helped me make my own crown. I think we did a pretty good job. Here I am with my crown and flower.


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Day 168: Panoramic Mellenellenopolis

Sometimes iPhone apps are awesome. Here's the view out of my sliding glass door, with a few glitches. Be sure to scroll in all four directions.
http://photosynth.net/view.aspx?cid=ceea5682-20ce-4255-bc15-c8f21908b03d

Day 167: How to Name Your Novel, Part I

Today is a very special day for you. I have created a handy guide, just in case you feel like writing a book.

How to Name Your Series of Murder Mystery Novels
by Melleny Thomasson

Sue Grafton: Grafton has gone with the most basic of organizational structures – the alphabet. A is for Alibi, B is for Burglar, C is for Corpse…she can keep going for 26 books with a very small outlay of mental effort in the naming department. I think she’s up to V now (for Vengeance, not Vendetta), so it looks like she plans on squeezing every last drop out of this series.

If you’re writing a mystery novel, it’s best to plan for it to become a series, as that’s the most profitable system. Readers become attached to characters and continue to buy each book in the series. And mystery readers are even more likely to enjoy a series, because they can skip past all the pesky character development and get right to the bloody steak knives and red herrings. You’ll want to make it clear that all the books in your series actually belong to the same series, because then it’s easier for the sheeplike reader to blindly purchase each subsequent novel with minimal hesitation or confusion. Plus, gimmicks are fun.

There are several ways to go about choosing a naming scheme for your mystery novel series. Let’s look at some popular authors and see what they’ve done.

J.D. Robb: Robb is the futuristic-mystery-novel-writing alterego of romance writer Nora Roberts. Her series naming scheme is less intuitive than Grafton’s when it comes to figuring out which book comes next in the series. Her books are called the “In Death” series because they each end with “In Death.” Conspiracy in Death. Glory in Death. Strangers in Death. Naked in Death. Origin in Death. You get the idea. There are already over 30 books in this series, and it seems like they can go on as long as the dictionary keeps spitting out nouns.

Janet Evanovich: Since the alphabet gimmick was already taken, Evanovich hopped on the number wagon instead. Her series is about a female bounty hunter who only takes the job out of desperation for some quick cash, and the first book was called One for the Money. Next came Two for the Dough. Then, Three to Get Deadly. And of course, Four to Score. They get even more painful after that. I think she’s up to 13 now, but I’ve stopped counting.

Jasper Fforde: You can go the nerdy route like Fforde and make literary references in your titles (and in your books). See if you can catch the very sneaky references in these titles: The Eyre Affair. The Fourth Bear: A Nursery Crime. Something Rotten. He also has The Well of Lost Plots and Lost in a Good Book. Side note: if you’re into nerdy elitism and literary references, his books are full of both and have been described as Zany (not by me).

Tamar Myers: Tamar Myers stands out among the many mystery novel writers who go the punny route. She has a "Pennsylvania-Dutch" culinary-themed series (no, seriously, it says that on the cover) with titles like Butter Safe than Sorry, Too Many Crooks Spoil the Broth, Batter Off Dead, Hell Hath No Curry, The Crepes of Wrath, Gruel and Unusual Punishment, and Between a Wok and a Hard Place, just for starters. There are many, many more. She also has a "Den of Antiquity" series that includes A Penny Urned, So Faux So Good, Poison Ivory, Gilt By Association, Baroque and Desperate, and Monet Talks. I wonder if she has a staff working around the clock to come up with titles.

Gillian Roberts: Roberts has proven that you don’t necessarily have to stick with the same series theme, unless you want to confuse your readers. Her Amanda Pepper (English teacher turned detective) series started with a location theme: Caught Dead in Philadelphia, Philly Stakes, and I’d Rather Be in Philadelphia. Then they went through a vague phase: With Friends Like These, In the Dead of Summer, The Bluest Blood. And then she hopped on the pun bandwagon and didn't look back, this time hitching the puns onto character names. Adam and Evil. Helen Hath No Fury. Claire and Present Danger. Till the End of Tom. She even had a contest, which I entered, to name one of the books. I personally prefer my Toby Or Not Toby over the winning entry: A Hole in Juan. And she had the good sense to end the series with All’s Well that Ends. Side note: I did receive an email reply from Gillian Roberts saying that she enjoyed my entries, and the Toby one made her laugh out loud. Fat lotta good that did me.

Denise Swanson: Swanson named her books so you can be sure to not get too attached to the unlucky murderee. Murder of a Botoxed Blonde. Murder of a Sweet Old Lady. Murder of a Royal Pain. Murder of a Real Bad Boy. Not exactly poetic, but the titles get the job done.

Michael Pearce: What do you get when you have a mystery novelist who wants to write off lavish travel expenses? A Dead Man in Naples. A Dead Man in Barcelona. A Dead Man in Istanbul. A Dead Man in Athens.

Joanne Fluke: And last, but certainly not least, we have Joanne Fluke. Her novels might not have clever titles, believable characters, or coherent plots, but they do have recipes. The Blueberry Muffin Murder. The Cream Puff Murder. The Lemon Meringue Pie Murder. The Peach Cobbler Murder. The Cherry Cheesecake Murder. This makes me wonder if she has a cookbook with all her murder mystery recipes compiled. 

Stay tuned for future installments of How to Name Your Novel. But don't hold your breath.

Day 166: Sunny Day

Today the sun was shining beautifully for at least five minutes, and I managed to take a quick picture of a tree and sky, and then I did stuff to the picture using an iPhone app.


And for a bonus, I used a different app to collage-ify a picture of Boris the Travel Monkey. No extra charge!


And just for fun, I made a tree erupt stars with a really lame app that has since been deleted.



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